He who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying. Friedrich Nietzsche
So often we hear that seeking success means avoiding the word "can't." It's a bad word. It holds us back. It isn't that we "can't" do something - it's that we haven't yet. But I've realized this week, there can be joy in saying can't...if you're saying it not to give up, but to get to the starting line.
First example...I am drowning at work. Too much work, too many deadlines (most already past), too many things I should have done yesterday. I was rushing this week to get something done, but finally realized yesterday that I can't. I can't get this one particular thing done, no matter how hard I work at it. And so I dropped it - for now. I'll pick it back up after I clear my plate from the million things...the remarkable thing is the joy I felt as soon as I acknowledged I can't finish this one project. I can't. But by putting it aside, I have the time and space to clear off some of the other projects, giving me a chance to reach the start line again with this project and have a better chance to complete it.
Second example...training. Heart rate training has been hard for me. I can't run fast and be in the HR zone I'm supposed to be in. I can't run far, I can't run fast, and I'm running a marathon on Sunday. And all in all, that would typically stress me out. I've had to change my perspective; running fast right now is like flying; I'm not ready to fly. I can't fly yet. I need to remember I'm still at the starting line. By acknowledging that the marathon will be what it will be, that I will focus on staying in low HR zones, going slow, and making the day about a long, steady effort, I've actually found a little peace from the stress - a little joy.
So maybe "can't" isn't all that bad, so long as it gets you to the start line again.
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