Holiday Hangover

Dieting on New Year's Day isn't a good idea as you can't eat rationally but really need to be free to consume whatever is necessary, moment by moment, in order to ease your hangover.  I think it would be much more sensible if resolutions began generally on January the second.  -- Helen Fielding

I could not agree more.  This holiday season has involved way too much sugar, way too much booze, and way too much in general.  I've kept up my training - heck, I love my new speed/cadence sensor so much that I did 2 hours on my trainer this morning.  Weird - it was even fun!  But it's nearly time to start dialing it back and getting with the program.  Back to healthier eating.  Back to training consistently and with purpose - my HIM plan starts January 6!!!  (It was supposed to start January 12, but I moved it up a week so I can "take off" a week when we're on vacation.)  So when does all this goodness start?  January 2nd - I say, as I sit here drinking spiked egg nog!  Happy Holidays!

I've Got the (virtual) Power (meter)!

The less effort, the faster and more powerful you will be. -- Bruce Lee

Or as the German electronica band Snap! says..."I've got the power!"

For Christmas, I got the Sodastream machine that I had wanted.  I don't know if I've ever drunk as much water in one day as I did yesterday.  I'm sure the novelty will wear off, but it's so nice to just bubble water whenever I want it.

The family also surprised me with a Riiiide speed/cadence sensor to use on my bike when I'm on the trainer.

Photo:  4iiii

It was a real beast to get it set up properly - my pedals were screwed on very tightly, so we couldn't get the one off to put the cadence magnet on the crank.  Then we couldn't get the magnets to line up with the sensor.  Eh.  Thankfully hubby and father-in-law were doing it, because it was just ticking me off.

After they got it set up, I signed up for TrainerRoad - a program that takes data from ANT+ heart rate and speed/cadence sensors to calculate virtual power, which it uses to adjust your workout and encourage you to train at certain levels.  I'm hoping this will help get my biking back up to snuff, since I've neglected it this fall.  I did the FTP (functional threshold power) test program to set my training zones, but I hadn't set the program up quite right, so I only had heart rate, not virtual power.  I tried to calculate my virtual power using some formulas on line, but then I tried another workout today and the recommended power targets seemed way off, so I need to do the FTP test again (with the right buttons clicked) so I can get measured power zones.  Kinda sucks, 'cause the FTP test is hard - it's supposed to be - but to get the most out of TrainerRoad, I figured I should have the best numbers.  And then I can get to work on being a more powerful biker - faster, with less effort.

Mele Kalikimaka

No person has the right to rain on your dreams.  -- Marian Wright Edelman

Sometimes you get Christmas in July.  Other times you get July in Christmas.  Yesterday the temps were forecast to be in the mid-to-high 70s...a far cry from the normal temps in the low 50s.  I could hardly wait for the weekend so I could do my long run - 16 miles.  And then it rained.  Severe thunderstorms were advised.  I got all psyched up (or perhaps psychotic) thinking I would do my 16 miles at the Y to avoid the storms.  Yes, three hours on a treadmill - why not?  Filled my water bottles, got my towels, etc., but when I went out to the car to drive to the Y, it wasn't raining at all.  Rather than go criminally insane, I came back in, filled my camelbak and got ready to run outside.

I headed out and the first 10 miles were lovely.  A light drizzle here and there, but on occasion the sun even showed through the clouds.  It was so pleasant.  And then.  And then the rains came.  Six more miles and it was pouring.  Well, I couldn't stop then - so I kept running.  I would like to tell you that running in warm December rain is refreshing, but it isn't.  It is just plain soggy and no fun.  But it was much better than running inside for 3 hours and besides, I feel kind of like a bad-ass for sticking it out and running in that.  That's the whole point of long runs, right?

Mele Kalikimaka is Hawaii's way to say Merry Christmas to You.  Yesterday wasn't quite Hawaiian weather and it wasn't exactly July in Christmas, but it was (at least for 10 miles) a nice little treat for a winter's run.

Dear Santa...

Believe in love.  Believe in magic.  Hell, believe in Santa Claus.  Believe in others.  Believe in yourself.  Believe in your dreams.  If you don't, who will?  -- Jon Bon Jovi

So, what does a triathlete ask for for Christmas?  I'm not into clothes.  I don't like jewelry - unless it's tri or running related.  I don't like perfume - at all.  I buy myself most of what I want...because the list isn't that long.  But come Christmas time, I'm required by the Big Man (that would be my husband) and the other Big Man (Santa) to cough up a list of things I would like to get that don't require me to try them on.  So what did I ask for this year?

From Big Man #1 - (and if you're reading this, hubby, the pictures are just illustrative...in case you bought something else...)

I asked for a Soda Stream.  I've kicked (mostly) the Diet Pepsi habit, but I still don't like the taste of water, so I'm obsessed with sparkling water.  Club soda.  Seltzer.  Whatever you wish to call it.  It would seem to be a simpler process if I could just bubble it myself.

Photo:  Amazon

I also asked for a swimming snorkel.  At Masters, on occasion, they do pull drills with snorkel and I have no snorkel.

Photo:  SwimOutlet

Finally I asked for a gift card to Lululemon - not because I plan on buying see-through yoga pants...but because they make a ton of tops that have thumbholes and you know I'm obsessed with that.

Photo:  Lululemon

So, what about from Big Man #2???

More calf sleeves.  Salted Caramel Gu.  Adjustable swim goggle cords.  Pistachios.  Yeah, I'm pretty wild.

Photo:  Gu Energy Gel

And my Christmas present for you?  Jon Bon Jovi.  In a Santa hat.

True Grit

Over time, grit is what separates fruitful lives from aimlessness -- John Ortberg

So I've been thinking a lot about grit the last few days.  Not True Grit the movie, although the 2010 remake wasn't so bad if you can get over Matt Damon as a Texas Ranger.  I did like Hailee Steinfeld as the little girl lead.  I never saw the 1968 version, so I got nothing there.

Anyway, apparently what sets high achievers apart from other folks is grit - at least so says this article, and I'm inclined to believe it.  The article defines grit as "the disposition to pursue very long-term goals with passion and perseverance, sustained over time."  I definitely need to dig down to my inner grit...while my word of the year for 2013 was STRIVE, I think my year of the word for 2014 will be GRIT.

Sometimes I do things that exhibit some grit.  Like last week, after I whined about running in the cold, I actually got up, got bundled, and ran 6 miles in sub-30 degree temps at 5 am.  Here's a picture of me being awesome.  There's four layers of shirt under that reflector vest, 2 layers of pants plus my calf sleeves - not because I was worried about my calves, but rather to add an extra layer of warm.  The part of me that got cold was the half inch between the bottom of my running pants and the top of my socks.  Oops.

Other times, I feel a little less gritty.  Like today.  I had a 14-mile run on the schedule.  I did awesome through 10 miles, pretty good through 13, and then I just blew it the last mile.  No passion or perseverance there, no sir.  I realize I can't be perfect all the time, but I was a little disappointed to finish what started as a really good run so poorly.  At least mentally - the Garmin actually doesn't bear out how I felt about the end.

The other deal with grit is how to instill it in our kids.  The article is also about whether you can make someone grittier.  I ran a 5K with my younger daughter this past weekend - she took 4 minutes off her previous PR and she got 3rd place in her age group.  As we ran together, I talked to her like I talk to myself in my head, about persevering, about having fun, about striving, etc.  Dig deep.  Charge the hill.  There's only 0.5 mile left - you can do anything for 5 minutes, right?  I don't know whether that will help her with grit, but it definitely works for me.  I just need to remember to have those talks with myself, too.

As a last bit of mommy brag - here she is getting her award!  Yeah, kid!

2014 Race Plans

Without leaps of imagination, or dreaming, we lose the excitement of possibilities.  Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning.  -- Gloria Steinem

So we've been rounding out our race schedules for 2014 and I think I'm pretty set (and also pretty much registered).  It looks like a good, and challenging, year.  Here's what's on deck:

January 19 - Frostbite 15K run (registered)
March 16 - Shamrock Marathon run (registered)
April 26 - RTC Sprint tri (registered)
June 1 - Raleigh 70.3 (registered)
July 12 - Muncie 70.3 (registered)
August 24 - IM Louisville (registering soon)
October 4 or 5 - either Crawlin' Crab 1/2 Marathon run or POW 2.4 Mile swim (gotta decide...)

I might throw a couple of shorter runs in here or there, and I'd like to do some of mile swims through my Masters group if they fit.  Otherwise, I think this will keep me plenty busy.  The excitement of possibilities abounds.

Brrrrrr

I enjoy hiking and skiing, like most Norwegians.  In winter, there will be snow for months on end.  In the summer, there are the long evenings to enjoy. -- Magnus Carlsen

It seems to me that I have traded in most of my proud Norwegian, hearty Midwestern blood for thin Southerner blood.  It is SOOOO cold - and it really hasn't gotten cold yet!  OK, so I never learned to ski, but I never minded being outside in the cold.  As a kid, we'd be out playing in the snow for hours.  Now, after being in Virginia for seven years, I have turned into a complete pansy when it comes to being cold.  And freezing rain/sleet/snow?  Forget about it - I'm not going out in that stuff...which is why today's 6 mile run will be done on the treadmill at the YMCA.  Not the most fun idea I've had, but since it's currently in the mid-30s and raining, with the temperature dropping and snow expected - well, I'm not running outside.

Good for my husband, though - he finished his first half-marathon ever in crummy weather on Sunday morning!  And he rocked the time.  Go, husband!  (Despite growing up in Michigan, he's also gotten very puny when it comes to cold weather...but better him running this past Sunday than me.)

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. -- Norman Vincent Peale

Yesterday it was in the high-60's here...unseasonably warm, which is awesome.  (There is, however, snow/freezing rain in the forecast for Sunday, but let's pretend that isn't real for a little bit.)  Hubby was able to take the little one to her triathlon training, so I was able to run from home through the nearby neighborhoods.  I got in a really nice 6-mile run while checking out the early Christmas lights.  Between the nice weather and the pretty sites, I had a fantabulous run.  Yes, that is a real word.  For serious.

I love Christmas.  I love Christmas lights.  I love the smell of real trees (even if I hate the mess and I have a heck of a time keeping the darn thing alive for 3 weeks).  I love surprising people with presents.  I love Christmas cookies...but I'm trying to avoid them this year.  I love our Elf on the Shelf.  I love love love Christmas.  But it's hard, because it's always at a crazy time of year for my job and so it often seems like I'm more cranky than happy about it.  In law school I remember having to shop for presents on Christmas Eve because I was too busy before then - it's not quite that bad now...but close.  But if I remember to push aside the crazy and enjoy the season (not to mention the Reason for the Season), it's the most wonderful time of the year.  And getting to run and look at the Christmas lights last night gave me a chance to see the world as a softer and more beautiful place.

Cram Time

When it's finals week and you've been studying for five hours straight, you need three things to get you through the night.  The biggest Slurpee you can find - half cherry, half Coke.  Pajama pants, the kind that have been washed so many times they are tissue-paper thin.  And finally, dance breaks.  Lots of dance breaks.  -- Jenny Han

Everyone knows that the last few weeks of a semester for a college student are sheer craziness.  What most people don't realize is that it is just as nuts for professors...and our insanity doesn't stop when finals are over, because then we get to grade.  Not complaining, I love my job - really, it's the best job in the world.  But my blogging is suffering due to my real life.  :)

I'm not going to resort to the Slurpee, because 1) Slurpees are nasty and 2) I'm kind of trying to stay away from the processed, refined, and blue-tinted sugar, but it is highly likely that I will be wearing pajama pants while I engage in frequent dance breaks.

Gobble, Gobble, Waddle, Waddle

An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day. -- Irv Kupcinet

After a few days of eating pretty clean, Thanksgiving comes along.  Now - don't get me wrong, I was always planning on eating what we had planned...turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans, and pumpkin pie.  But my plan was to eat it in moderation, enjoy it immensely, and get back into the groove.  In fact, I've joined up with a group of ladies for a "challenge" in December to eat clean - which should be really hard but will be a great thing for me.

We started Thanksgiving with a Turkey Trot 10K.  I was a little disappointed in my time, but it was on a hilly course and really cold, so in retrospect, I should be pretty happy with how I did.  Then we came home and had a paleo breakfast casserole that I had cooking while we were at the race (and a ton of mimosas - yipe!).  Thanksgiving dinner was awesome and I didn't pig out.  Yeah me.

I was ready to get back to basics the next day - they don't call it Black Friday for no reason - but we had a substantial amount of leftovers and then we went out to an Irish pub for dinner and I had fish & chips, plus an Irish cream ale, for dinner.  I kind of viewed that it was one last shot before the December challenge.  :)

But now looking at the situation in retrospect, how I handled Thanksgiving was just right for me, but how I handled yesterday was not.  My real challenge for December (and forever...) is not to eat clean, but rather to reframe how I look at food.  On Thanksgiving, I ate food because it was part of a family tradition.  I only ate good tasting food, real food, that I made myself -- and I enjoyed it.  On Friday, though, I ate something with the mindset of a death-row prisoner eating his last supper.  That's just plain ridiculous and I shouldn't think that way.  It may not have been the healthiest of choices, but it was very well cooked and tasty, and I did enjoy my time with my family eating it.  It is not something I would eat every day; in fact, I rarely eat fish & chips, but I figured an Irish pub was the place to do it.  Food is part of life, for fueling my training, for spending time with family and friends, and for nutrition.  Food shouldn't be a reward, or a punishment, or a comfort.

While I will do my best to eat clean for the December challenge, it is most important for me to remember what food is supposed to be about.

Rainbows

If your life had lyrics, would they be any good? -- Douglas Coupland

One of the sweet things in my life is my Monday night drive with my younger daughter.  I have Masters at the same place where she has the swim practice for her triathlon training - and its a haul from our house, so we go down together and wait while the other is in the pool.  After we chitchat about her day, we often turn on the radio and sing, which is pretty fun.  Last night I was paying closer attention than normal -- we were stuck in a horrendous traffic jam and I was trying to keep myself calm.  (I'm not good at being late...it makes me absolutely panicked.  Yeah, I know - I'm a walking ball of anxiety.)

Anyway, Miley Cyrus's "Wrecking Ball" came on.  The first line of the chorus is "I came in like a wrecking ball...".  My sweet daughter, however, was singing it as "I came in like a rainbow...".  It was so cute and so much her - she does come in like a rainbow, in so many ways.  In the most obvious, she is HORRIBLE at picking out clothes.  Orange shirts with pink pants and red shoes.  Yikes!  We've had to have her change clothes before because we would be embarrassed to be seen at a restaurant with her.  But the main way that she comes in like a rainbow is that she will often appear after I've had a bad day or a rough patch, snuggle up to me, and make everything a little bit happier.

I'm not going to correct her - I think her lyrics suit her life.  And I need a few more rainbows now and then.

(PS - because I was a total stress ball when I got to Masters last night, I did not have the gumption to try block starts, AGAIN.  I am not good at leaving my comfort zone when my head isn't in the right place...)

Thanksgiving Post

When you rise in the morning, give thanks for the light, for your life, for your strength.  Give thanks for your food and for the joy of living.  If you see no reason to give thanks, the fault lies in yourself -- Tecumseh

In honor of Thanksgiving week, I am going to share a list of just a few of the many things I am thankful for.

1.  My husband - my biggest fan, an excellent sherpa, and an overall great guy

2.  My girls - my two biggest little fans and daily sources of inspiration for me to be healthy and happy

3.  A job that is flexible enough to let me indulge in my training while it is still light, still warm, and not 3:30am

4.  A bunch of great friends that support what I do or at least don't laugh out loud when I announce my next crazy idea - you know who you are

5.  Online and real-life communities that offer support, advice, and inspiration (Beginner Triathlete, Richmond Tri Club, Swim Bike Mom, My Fitness Pal, and many others)

6.  An extended family that is still not sure why I do what I do, but is suitably impressed nonetheless

7.  My tri-bike, Freyja (and NO, the seat is not that high - this is before my fitting, where they cut off many, many inches of seatpost)

8.  My health

9.  A local food co-op that makes it easier to eat well - Fall Line Farms - in addition to living in a town with multiple farmers markets

10.  Really, really good coffee - I get it from a local roaster through the co-op

For these things, and so many other things, I give thanks.  Have a great Thanksgiving week!

Comfort Zones

I've learned in my life that it's important to be able to step outside your comfort zone and be challenged with something you're not familiar or accustomed to.  That challenge will allow you to see what you can do.  -- J.R. Martinez

So on Monday at Masters, when they were doing the starts off the blocks (in preparation for a Masters swim meet coming up), I didn't do it.  I've never actually learned how to jump in the water, and I figured at my age, why bother.  (I know, I know, I'm not that old...and I was a little embarrassed having that thought when some of my fellow swimmers, well into their 60s, got up there like champs.)  I came home and I told my husband that I didn't jump in and that it was fine because between that and learning flip turns the previous week, I was just a little too outside my comfort zone.  Heck, I don't didn't even like to swim...I'm already outside my comfort zone - and now you want me to flip and jump and act like I even dreamed of being on a swim team when I was a kid?  Seriously?  Give my comfort zone a little break here already...

But now, with a few days of perspective behind me, I actually feel kind of stupid for not even trying.  I know that I have spent most of this year (and am planning to spend a lot of next year) pushing my comfort zone, and maybe right after finishing my last real race of 2013 wasn't the right time...but isn't that what life is all about?  I'll never know what I can do unless I try, right?  As long as I don't even try, it is 100% certain that I will never be able to dive into the pool.  In fact, until a couple weeks ago, it was 100% certain that I could never do a flip turn.

I need to remember that being less comfortable for a while will get me a lot further in the long run.

Good Morning, Sunshine!

Morning comes whether you set the alarm or not. -- Ursula K. LeGuin

I am trying to get myself up in the morning for training.  I seem to be able to get up for swimming on Wednesdays (and sometimes Fridays) just fine - up at 5a for Masters at 6a.  In fact, this morning I was up watching my alarm clock from 4:45a until just before the alarm was set to go off.  But on non-swimming mornings, I'm having a real struggle making myself want to get up and out of bed.  I need to get over this, because as training ramps up (and it is...started my marathon training plan already this week!), I'm going to need to squeeze some workouts in the morning or I'll never fit everything in.

One thing I hope will help - my new rockin' pink headlamp.  Isn't it the cutest?  I got it from Roadrunner Sports.

Maybe the opportunity to wear that more will get me out of bed in the morning?

2014. The year of full-on bat-wing crazy. Bring it.

I know when I'm getting ready to mess up, I'm going to do it full-on.  -- Sandra Bullock

You might well remember that nothing can bring you success but yourself. -- Napolean Hill

Here's how the 2014 season is shaping up.  I'm excited, although occasionally I just kind of freak out a bit thinking about it.  Like OMG freak out.

I'm already registered for:
March 16 - Shamrock Marathon
June 1 - Raleigh 70.3
July 12 - Muncie 70.3

And then, the crown jewel of the 2014 season is shaping up to be IRONMAN Louisville, August 24.  We haven't registered me yet for this, but we did reserve a hotel room, told the extended fam, etc.  The race doesn't sell out, although I want to register before then just to get the idea settled in my mind.  But no real rush to hand over the beaucoup bucks right now.

So what does the rest of 2013 look like?  A couple of fun runs - a Turkey Trot 10K and a Toys for Tots 5K, probably with the little one.  But basically the training starts now.  I have my marathon training plan already in the works, the HIM plan kicks in 1/12/14, and then I found a 12-week bridge from HIM-IM program that fits perfectly between Raleigh & Louisville.  (I'll squeeze Muncie in as a long training day.)

So there it is.  I'm biting off a lot for 2014, but I don't think it's more than I can chew - it's just going to take work on my part to make it successful.  But after this past season, I'm feeling rather pleased and confident that I can do it, if I set my mind to it now.  Bring it on.

Getting Faster Slowly

Hasten slowly. -- Augustus

The 2013 race season is nearly at an end - just a couple of fun runs left...a Turkey Trot 10K on Thanksgiving morning and a Toys for Tots 5K with the little one.  Today I ran my 4th half mary of the year (5th if you count the one in the HIM) - and I set my 2013 half-mary PR.  It's still slow...I'm still over 10 minutes off my actual half mary PR, but I'm over 30 minutes faster than I was last year at this same race.  In fact, today I even ran somewhere around 5 minutes faster than I did in October (which was on a flatter course).   It's happening slowly, but I'm getting faster.  Again.  FINALLY.  Ugh.

Bottom line - I'm really happy with this season.  I've accomplished (and generally exceeded) all of the goals I had for this year.  I have a long ways to go before I'm as fast as I was, and want to be again, but I can see it from here at least.  Time to rest and then get on to next year's goals.  More on that shortly!

Flipping Out!

I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down. -- Mitch Hedberg

For the first time in my adult life, I have managed to do a forward roll.  In the water.  Near the wall of the pool.  And it kinda sorta almost looked like a flip turn.  Yeah me!

When I was little, I did gymnastics.  My mom had me take classes and my dad built me a low wooden balance beam that I played with in the back yard.  I had gymnastics books and watched gymnastics on TV.  I was never very good - I managed to get to a one-handed cartwheel.  I tried an aerial cartwheel a couple times, but mostly landed on my head.  I never managed a walkover or flip.  And definitely, I was better at tumbling than at any of the apparatus events.  I wasn't fast enough for the vault, strong enough for the bars, or coordinated enough for the beam.  But I did love to tumble.

Sometime after 8th grade, however, I lost the ability to flip my legs move over my head.  I did a couple cartwheels as an adult to prove to my daughters I could, but it made my wrists hurt.  But you weren't going to find me doing forward rolls, or backward rolls, or straddle rolls, or anything of the sort.  It made me a little dizzy.  Or a lot of dizzy.

So when the Master's program Facebook page announced that last night was going to be flip turn night, I almost considered not going.  I wanted to learn how to do flip turns, but everytime I tried to do them, I just managed to spin around in the water and swallow half the pool.  There was no flip, just turn.

I went to masters.  The first many times we tried flipping, I turned.  No legs over.  Ended up facing the wrong way.  Nothing attractive or useful about it.  But then we tried a couple times with toys -- noodles first, the pull buoys, and all of a sudden, I was able to do it!  I can flip!  Then the big test, flipping without toys.  Umm.  Not so much the first kajillion tries.  But eventually I figured it out and by the end of Masters, I had actually done a couple of flip turns.  And even close enough to the wall to push off, although I generally managed to push off too high, meaning I was pushing myself WAY underwater (like 7 feet under) and had a really hard time getting back to the surface...but I did it.  Between that and learning (and I should add air quotes to "learning") to do butterfly, I almost (ALMOST) feel like a real swimmer.  Now I just need to learn breast stroke.  And practice.  Practice.  Practice.

This Little Piggy Went to Market

Well, I like to be kept on my toes.  I look for a challenge.  I don't like to create steps that I've already walked.  I like to see if I can create something new. -- Jeffrey Wright

I was just going to blog about my new socks...but there are other exciting things to share, so maybe I'll just be a little disjointed.  But we'll start with the socks, because I'm pretty jazzed about them.  About 2 long runs ago, I got an ugly blister on/between my toes.  So I ordered a few pairs of Injinji socks to try - they are toe socks.  Here is a pair on my feet:

OK - they may look dorky, but they are remarkably comfortable.  I forgot I had them when I did my long run this past weekend, so I have worn them the last 2 days for my shorter runs.  In addition to preventing toe rubbing, after the race, I can put my flipflops on without having to freeze my tootsies.  Yeah!

The socks were a splurge buy.  My other tri purchase this week was NOT optional.  Here are the goggles I've been wearing for the last 5 years.  I (heart) them very much.  I have another pair that I have kept in my bag, but I didn't wear them because this pair has been so perfect.  Well, perfect does not include a broken strap -- and unlike all modern goggles that have separate straps that can be replaced, etc., my favorites had a unitary strap.  Broken is broken.

So I went to the local swimming store (Disco Sports), favorite goggles in hand, and asked them to find me the same pair.  Of course, 5 years later, they didn't carry the exact same model, but they had a pair that was essentially the same shape.  And, as the salesman said - they're the entry-level goggles so they're very reasonably priced.  So I bought two - one clear and one tinted.  I've been swimming with tinted goggles forever, it will be interesting to see how different everything looks.

Finally, as a bonus (and having nothing to do with shopping or toes), I got some health screening done today as part of open enrollment at my employer.  My blood pressure is great - always is thankfully, but so is my cholesterol and glucose...awesome sauce.  Go me!

The Long Talk

In the long run , we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves.  The process never ends until we die.  And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility. -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Yesterday was my last real long run before the Richmond Half Marathon.  I'm not sure how I'm feeling about the race.  My pace on my long runs has been good, but recently life has gotten in the way of some of my training sessions, so I don't feel as confident as I did going into the half mary I did in October.  I know I'll be fine to finish, obvs, but I was hoping to beat my October time...and I'm not sure that's in the cards.  (Plus the Richmond course is hillier than the other, but that's not what is holding me back from a purely positive mental attitude.)  I hate missing training sessions - I realize that is a little OCD, but what can you do.

The other interesting thing that is going on is that Husband and I have been having the "long talk" - the one about doing a full IM.  Apparently my IM-crazy flag has been showing.  We had always talked about 2015 and maybe doing our first IMs together - but he's faster than me, so it wouldn't really be together anyway.  For my first one, I'd really like to have a full-time cheerleader out there for me, rather than just to see me finish.  And it turns out his dream IM (Mt Tremblant) is not the one I had been dreaming of (Louisville).  So what if I did IM Louisville in 2014?

Hmmm.  Interesting thought.  So we're thinking about it - just thinking, mind you.  Way too much to think about, but we're checking out logistics, training schedules, etc. to see if it is even in the realm of the possible.  Entirely conceivable at this point that it is not going to work out at all - especially given that there are small people involved.  But how cool would it be?  And yikes!

Super Fan

I'm also a fan of ridiculously coloured and patterned socks. -- Daniel Radcliffe

OK, so today is a super fan day.  I'm a big fan of craft beer and good wine...in fact, heading out to a happy hour with work friends once I get this post up.  See what a diligent blogger I am?

I'm also a big fan of flip flops, yoga pants, and baseball hats - but that could just be because I'm a slob.

I'm a Fanilow.  Yes, I will admit it, and since it's November 1, here's a little relevant Barry for you.

You can't mock the Manilow.  No.  No, you can't.  Don't even try it.

And one more super-fan shoutout...an old friend of mine is doing her first IM this weekend - Go Samurai Cynthia!!!  I'm so proud of you (even if you are too busy being a lawyer to be a diligent blogger...).  I can't wait to follow in your IM footsteps!

Garbage In, Garbage Out

If I eat junk food and have a workout the next day, I feel a significant difference in the way my body responds to exercise.  I'm sluggish, tired and run out of energy very quickly. -- Josie Loren

It has been a crazy couple of days in the TriMom household - OK, let's be realistic, it's always a little bit crazy in the TriMom household, but usually the crazy is kept to a manageable level.  Not so much of late.  And unfortunately, due to the crazy and the stress of the crazy, I have not been eating as well as I normally do.  And it shows.

There's an old computer program science principle GIGO, or Garbage In, Garbage Out.  The idea is pretty much whatever you put in, especially if you don't think carefully about what you put in, is likely to result in stupid or bad results.  The human body is pretty much like a computer - you put in crap, nothing good comes of it.  And it's not just that my body feels icky (which it does - I can totally tell that my stomach is not happy about what I ate the last couple days), but my mind feels icky too.  I'm rather short-tempered and not able to think or focus as well as normal.  It would be easy to blame the crazy, but I really truly believe that my focus and mood are much better when I eat better.  I need to re-commit to taking care of what goes in so that only good stuff comes out.

On a higher note, my kids are awesome.  This weekend was the Call Federal Marathon Jr. kids races.

My younger daughter ran the 1-miler, came in 9th of 92 in her age group, and took about a minute off her mile PR time.  My older daughter ran the 2-miler and was 3rd overall girl.  These two monkeys truly inspire me.  So I should stop eating garbage.

The Things We Do for Love

Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with who fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart. -- Marcus Aurelius

OK, so Marcus Aurelius was a smart dude, but I think the late-70s band 10cc may have been pretty clever as well.  As I'm sitting here exhausted because I had to cram a masters swim AND my long run for the weekend all into today, Friday -- when I'm also supposed to be working -- I've been thinking...why the hell am I doing this?  Well, I'm doing it for the things I love.  Like my family, who I'd like to spend time with this weekend.  And in particular my kids, who are racing tomorrow morning (taking up that running opportunity) and playing soccer on Sunday a million miles away from home (another running opportunity down the drain).  And watching football, including my alma mater Iowa...and watching college football is something to do with my husband (but can't be done while running or swimming).  And I love my job, so I don't want to mess that up...basically the suck-i-tude of today can be summed up by "The Things I Do for Love."

But then, after I got into this song, I realize the song has a lot more to do with my life than just how crappy this weekend is.  Yeah, I know - having deep thoughts instead of working is so productive.

Too many broken hearts have fallen in the river 

Too many lonely souls have drifted out to sea, 

You lay your bets and then you pay the price 

The things we do for love, the things we do for love. 

Yeah, broken hearts falling in the river.  That may be me and swimming.  Although seriously - of late I seem to be turning into a fish.  Weirdest.  Thing.  Ever.

Communication is the problem to the answer 

You've got her number and your hand is on the phone 

Living in a 2.5 triathlete household that also includes a crazy-ass soccer player requires extensive communication.  Unfortunately, communication is not always the solution - sometimes talking through what all we have to cover in any given week creates more drama than less.  I've been kind of feeling that way lately, although I'd never want any of us to give up our goals and dreams.  We're all working so hard to achieve.

The weather's turned and all the lines are down 

The things we do for love, the things we do for love. 

Like walking in the rain and the snow 

When there's nowhere to go 

And you're feelin' like a part of you is dying 

OK, seriously, if you've ever raced in the rain.  Or the snow.  Or the sleet.  Or the heat.  Yeah, you're going nowhere fast and feeling like you're dying.  I've been there.  Yup.

And you're looking for the answer in her eyes. 

You think you're gonna break up 

Then she says she wants to make up. 

Ooh you made me love you 

Ooh you've got a way 

Ooh you had me crawling up the wall. 

Occasionally, very seriously, I wonder if I shouldn't just chuck this all and find a nice habit like knitting - one that wouldn't compete for my family's time and attention, one that wouldn't have me squeezing in 3 hours of workouts on a Friday (and then struggling to work...except I felt like blogging instead), one that would not be completely insane.  But then the problem is, I love it.  I really love what I'm doing and I don't want to give it up.  I'd be crawling up the walls if I wasn't training and racing now.

Like walking in the rain and the snow 

When there's nowhere to go 

And you're feelin' like a part of you is dying 

And you're looking for the answer in her eyes. 

You think you're gonna break up 

Then she says she wants to make up. 

Ooh you made me love you 

Ooh you've got a way 

Ooh you had me crawling up the wall. 

A compromise would surely help the situation 

Agree to disagree but disagree to part 

When after all it's just a compromise of 

The things we do for love, the things we do for love....

Just a silly story about an active family and the things we do for love...

Random Thoughts

I've never been convinced that experience is linear, circular, or even random.  It just is.  I try to put it in some kind of order to extract meaning from it, to bring meaning to it. -- Toni Cade Bambara

Well, it's been a long time...since I rock and rolled.

And since I blogged.  Things have been all sorts of busy around here, although it would be hard for me to tell you exactly what I've been busy doing for the last week.  So instead, I'll just tell you some random stuff.  Later this week, an update on my goals.  Which isn't going as well as I have hoped.

• On Monday night I was able to stay with the "faster" lane for Masters.  Go me!  And we worked hard - part of the pre-set was 8x100m coming down to 5 seconds rest.  Dang.  5 seconds rest is just long enough to look at the clock and turn around to go again.  It's supposed to make me faster - let's hope so.  Also we are working on doing more "non-free" stroke - so I've been playing at the butterfly, which is the most useless stroke for a triathlete, but it's a little bit fun and allegedly it will strengthen my upper body.  One can only hope.
• Of course, this morning at Masters I felt slow.  :(
• But my running is getting faster.  I had a nice "easy" run on the plan yesterday and was able to maintain a real nice pace.
• A friend of mine is training to run a half-marathon, the same one I'm running in November.  She implied it is because some crazy friend of hers did a HIM and she felt inspired.  :)
• I've decided that core work needs to be a big part of my winter training plan.  I bought some core videos on swich.io.  The website is cool (and I'd link to it, but it seems to be down) - it is a buy/sell site for triathlon gear started by a couple of local women.  Love it.
• One of the things I did this week that kept me busy was apple picking with the fam.  I love apples.  Not as much as I love pumpkin-flavored anything, but definitely one of my favorite fall foods.  And we got there while granny smith apples were in season.  Yeah!
• I'm definitely excited about doing most likely 2 HIM next year, but I'm also really looking forward to doing a full sometime in the near future.  I'm jealously watching an old friend of mine taper for IMFL.  So cool.

An Unusual Power of a Compliment

A compliment is something like a kiss through a veil.  -- Victor Hugo

Yesterday I went out to lunch with a bunch of my female colleagues from work.  A few of them don't see me as often and complimented me on how good I looked, etc.  Lunch was good - mmmm - Mexican food.  I had a couple beers, lots of chips with cheese dip and table-side guacamole, and enchiladas with chicken and chorizo in a tomatillo sauce with wayyyy too much cheese.  Obviously I don't always eat this way - but it was a special occasion and I did stick to many of my eating tenets...no margaritas (too much sugar), no wheat (except beer, which I don't count...call me a hypocrite), plenty of protein. 

As we were leaving, one of the women in my group came up to me and said - "You are getting so teeny tiny - I'm so happy to see that you actually do eat and drink."  Hmmm.  That hit me in kind of a weird place.  I worry all the time about how much I eat and drink -- but not that I don't eat...I worry that I eat or drink too much.  Most of the time.  It seemed odd that someone would think that I don't eat or drink.  

And then what was intended to be a compliment actually made me start to feel really bad - I obviously did eat too much yesterday.  I actually got a little angry at myself for eating too much.  So I ended up not feeling like eating dinner, which I assume was more mental than anything.  How could something as simple as a compliment throw me so far out of whack?

Movin' On Up!

The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving. -- Oliver Wendell Holmes

Yeah me!  It is official.  Next Monday night I am no longer swimming in the turtle lane at Masters.  My coach said that I don't belong in that lane any more, no matter who is swimming, and that I will be starting every Monday session going forward in lane 2!!!  (You may have noticed I am a little bit excited over here...giddy in fact. However, I will not torture you with The Jefferson's theme song.  I am hoping just the mention of it will give you a little ear worm.  I've been singing it all night since Coach moved me up.)

Blame It on the Rain

One must know the so-called 'lesson of a downpour.'  A man, caught in a sudden rain en route, dashes along the road not to get wet or drenched.  Once one takes it for granted that in rain he naturally gets wet, he can be in a tranquil frame of mind even when soaked to the skin.  This lesson applies to everything. -- Yamamoto Tsunetomo

Rainy run today - I run in the rain, because it seemed for a while, whenever I had a race scheduled, it would rain.  Like it was my fault - the heavens would open up because, oh, TriMom is racing, guess it better rain!  OK, so I'm not really in charge of the weather, and if I was, I wouldn't ask for rain while I'm racing, obviously.  But the thing of it is, there is actually some peace in running in the rain.  Not crazy soaker downpours - noone likes those, but today was a good steady drizzle.  I was soaked when I finished my eight miles.  And it was a great run.  I achieved a tranquil frame of mind, even when soaked to the skin.

The problem is I haven't actually figured out how to take this lesson and apply it to things besides running in the rain.  Yet.  I think the first step is probably to stop blaming everything bad on the rain.  There's going to be rain in life, and I'm going to get wet.  But so what?  When I figure this out, then I will find a tranquil frame of mind.  In the meantime, I'll hang with Milli Vanilli and blame it on the rain.  :)

All Thumbs

My rule of thumb is that if I am interested or intrigued by something, others will be as well. -- Wolf Blitzer

A couple of thoughts on thumbs...my rule of thumb is that most people are NOT interested or intrigued by what I am interested or intrigued by.  Triathlon is pretty much still a "fringe" sport, despite the fact that nearly everyone I know does them.  That has more to do with the people I hang with than the fact that triathlons are for normal people.

That being said, now that I'm wearing my awesome 70.3 necklace, lots of people are wondering what the hell it is all about.  It's actually kind of funny what people think...a sample of some questions I've answered recently:  Did you run that far?  (No.  It was a triathlon.)  OMG, did you swim that far?  (Are you flippin' kidding me?)  Is that how many hours it takes?  (What kind of drugs are you on?)  If that's only half, how far is a full IM?  (Uh.  Can you do math?)  Are you serious?  (No.)  Are you crazy?  (Yes.)  You are awesome.  (Hella yeah.)

But back to thumbs.  Two thoughts.  First, how awesome are running jackets with thumb holes?  Why don't all long-sleeved clothing items have thumb holes?

Yeah.  That's my hand.  My fingers aren't nearly as long as they look in this picture - really.  But check out that awesome thumb hole.  I have 3 jackets with thumb holes and they are my favorites.  Ever.  If I wear a long sleeve shirt while I'm running (and not one of these jackets), I ball up my hand inside the sleeves except for my thumbs.  These are just much more efficient.

And for good reason.  My thumbs have a mind of their own when I run.  In fact, when I run, my thumbs look like I'm hitchhiking.  Or giving you a thumbs up.  Either way, seriously weird.  Check this out.

Seriously.  There are just a few of the races I've done.  Doesn't matter if it's a running race or a triathlon - there's my thumb.  Funny, huh?

Another One Bites the Dust...and a Race Report

I spent an awful lot of my life underestimating myself and, as a result, not exceeding my own expectations. -- Jane Pauley

I don't think this quote has it quite right, at least not for me.  I'm starting to wonder, at the nudging of my husband, if I am spending too much time underestimating myself and thus ALWAYS exceeding my expectations. Is it really a challenge if I keep marking everything off the list the first time I try?  Yesterday was just another example where I succeeded and exceeded beyond expectation, making me wonder if I am sometimes aiming too low.   (Alternatively, it could just be that I have the phenomenal ability to over-perform...but that seems far-fetched.)

N.B. - you would be able to see the crazy list of "DONE" accomplishments this year over in my 2013 Races section, except that Blogger's text feature is apparently messed up.  I couldn't update it and then I managed to make it disappear.  :(  Hopefully Blogger will fix the issue so you can see how successful I've been this season.

Anyway, back to the point:  Yesterday I ran a half mary with the goal of breaking 2:30.  I set this as my goal because I had not broken 2:30 since I got hurt training for the marathon a few years ago.  My first half mary was 2:15; my personal best is 2:05; but I've been running in the 2:45-3:00 range for over a year.  I got the inkling that I might be able to break 2:30 because I did so well with the run leg of the HIM last month - 2:41 AFTER a long morning of swimming and biking.

It was a great day for racing - clear (unlike the same race last year where it poured all race) and sunny.  If anything, it was surprisingly warm for October.  And the course was a great course to shoot for my goals, because it is relatively flat, except for a few overpasses.  I went out a little fast, but overall, I was able to maintain a fairly consistent pace.  Check out the data from my Garmin below.

The low dips are water stations (the one right after 8 was actually skittles & pretzels...mmmm), except for the wider dip right after mile 11.  I was getting tired and there was a hill for an overpass, so I allowed myself to walk up it.  It made my 12th mile a bit slow, but otherwise, I'm happy with the good, basically even pace - and I even had a little left in the tank to sprint into the finish.

I also met my goal and then some.  2:23!  Yeah me!  On top of that, I got the overall results and I have moved squarely back into the middle-of-the-pack for all runners at this race, women my age, and even better than MOP if you look at women overall.  This is exciting, because in a number of my races, I have been back-of-the-pack, dragging up the rear, etc.  It's a lot more fun when you finish among a big group of people, are passing runners the whole way, etc.  But of course, it's really about beating myself - and I did.  I set a goal of 2:30, I met that goal, and I'm on my way back to the half mary times I am proud of.  The blurry pic below is me celebrating post-race with a giant crab and a cup of beer.

As excited as I am that I met another challenge - smashed it really - I am wondering if I need to reevaluate some of my new goals.  Am I being too easy on myself?  I guess that is one nice thing about using the SMARTER plan - I'm supposed to regularly evaluate and re-evaluate my goals.  Maybe I'll need to reassess my time goal for the marathon in March if my running keeps going strong.  But for now, I'm just going to be happy about my performance and move onto working on that goals/checklist system I wrote up last week.  HereWeGo!

Habit Forming

Achieve success in any area of life by identifying the optimum strategies and repeating them until they become habits. -- Charles J. Givens

I'm stealing an idea that some of my friends on the magical Internets have started doing - create a list of goals and then create a daily checklist that includes actions/habits that will lead towards those goals.  As the seasons in my world are changing -- the seasons related to the Earth's rotation around the sun and the sports seasons (tri vs. running) -- as well as looking forward to a new "season" in my world -- an upcoming sabbatical, it seems like a good time to create a list of goals and a daily checklist.

Of course, to be good goals, they should be smart - or SMART, if you're one of those acronym-y type people.  :-)  Specific; Measurable; Attainable; Relevant; and Time-bound.  And then, if you're really cool, you set SMARTER goals...adding in Evaluating and Re-evaluating.  So here are a couple of SMART goals that I want to work towards:

GOAL

1. Weigh 145 pounds by December 31, 2013
1. Specific - check; measurable - yep; attainable - yes (< 10 pounds over 3 months); relevant - I've talked about my weight issue before and why it matters; time-bound...got a set deadline.
2. Can it be smarter?  Yes - I should evaluate where I am every week (weighing in) and re-evaluating if something unexpected comes up.
2. Train for a sub-5:30 marathon, held on March 16, 2014
1. Specific; measurable; attainable...I think so, depending on how this fall's half marathons go; relevant - it is starting to matter to me to have a concrete AND public goal for my events...it gives me a target and it makes me accountable; time-bound - yep.
2. I should probably evaluate weekly to see how well I'm following my training plan and evaluate based on that, as well as any unexpected issues that arise.
3. Train for a sub-7:00 HIM, held on June 1, 2014
1. Specific; measurable; attainable...not sure - this may be a "reach" goal, since it's a 21-minute PR - that being said, it's 9 months away AND I have made great strides even since the HIM I did (see fantastic swim last week!); relevant - hella yeah!; and definitely time-bound.
2. Smarter?  See above - evaluate & reevaluate on training plans.
4. Write at least 60 minutes, at least 4 days a week.  (See, I do things other than train...sometimes.)
1. Specific - check; measurable - uh huh; attainable...well, it will be a challenge, no doubt - this is where a lot of my problems with productivity live - BUT having this goal should make me work towards making it a habit; relevant - yeah, I got me some deadlines I need to meet; and time-bound.
2. Smarter?  Yep, actually this is one that I can evaluate and re-evaluate on a daily and weekly basis.  And when my sabbatical comes, I need to change this from 60 minutes to another, bigger number.  But I can't even guess what that number is right now.

So that's all good - yeah there are other things in my life that I'm working on - but let's stick with these public goals for now...what'cha think, TriMom?  How'ya gonna get there?  Now for the daily checklist:

CHECKLIST:

1. Read the above goals.  Remember why you are doing it.  (To achieve #s 1-4)
2. Consider every meal as a chance to make a good decision.  Choose wisely.  (To achieve #s 1-3).
3. Train daily (including rest days as required by plan).  (To achieve #s 2-3)
1. Roll, stretch, etc. to be able to maintain training.
2. Listen to my body.
3. Switch up easy and hard days, swimming/biking/running days.
4. Get at least 6 hours of sleep a night.  (To achieve #s 1-4)
5. Write 60 minutes.  (To achieve # 4)
6. Evaluate the day.  (To achieve #s 1-4)
1. Have I hit my checklist?
2. Are there things that are standing in the way?  Can I do anything to change them?
3. Are there other items to add to my checklist that will help me achieve my goals?

Lather, rinse, repeat.  OK, I get that this seems a little bit rigid, but I have big goals and big plans - and these are going to take some big work on my part.  The only way to achieve success is to identify strategies to get me there and then make them habits.  Let's do this.  Next week - as soon as I get done with my latest travel junket and race - because travel = crappy eating and sleeping and racing = the obligatory post-race binge....well-deserved, me thinks.  :-)

Swim Race # 2...TriMom - 1, River - 0

Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning. -- Benjamin Franklin

This morning I did another mile swim race - it was the last in the series of races held by Peluso Open Water (technically # 2, because the one in June was cancelled due to dangerous water conditions, but since it came after # 3, held in August, we'll just call it # 3 for simplicity's sake - that's simple enough, right?).  In August, I did the race to prove to myself that I would be OK for Patriot's HIM - I swam it in 52:50 and was thrilled.  The cut-off for the HIM was 1:15, so that gave me plenty of time for the last 0.2 miles.

This morning I swam the race again.  Why?  Weird, huh - I have no triathlons scheduled until next year.  I don't even like swimming in the river (wink, wink).  Why would I get up and swim a river race unnecessarily?  Because I wanted to see if I have improved.  And because they serve mimosas afterwards, but that is just a minor reason.  Maybe more than minor, but really it was about seeing if I was faster.

Improve I most certainly did - 37:53!  I cut nearly 15 minutes off my time from just a month previous!  Now - to be fair - there was very little current this morning and the race was wetsuit legal.  (The water temp was 68 degrees, downright balmy compared to the low-50s of the air temperature.)  Both of those things certainly would cause my time to be faster...but not 15 minutes faster.  I'm actually becoming a better swimmer!  On top of that, I actually hit the dock at 37:15, but I was behind a few other women climbing the stairs and you can't pass at the dock.  I may have been 20-30 seconds faster than even that.

Now...this is all very exciting...Improvement.  Achievement.  Success.  But you know what else?  This qualifies me to swim the 2.4 mile To the Bridge & Back race next October - and if I can swim 2.4 miles in 2 hours, I'm well on my way to being able to do a full Ironman.  Watch out, world - this girl is starting to be able to swim!

Enter Fall!

Autumn is my favorite season.  -- Johnny Kelly

Autumn's the mellow time. -- William Allingham

OMG.  I totally love fall.  It's my favorite season - cooler weather, sweaters and hoodies, college football, It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, back to school, the end of tri season and the beginning of running season...not that I don't love triathlons and all, but I do like falling back to my old favorite for the off-season.  I love the color orange and have the (perhaps-misguided) impression that it looks good on me.  I love the tans, and browns, and plaids that come with fall.  There is not much that is not awesome about autumn.  Except this year.  Fall is presenting me with quite a challenge - you see, I'm obsessed with pumpkin.  Pumpkin bread.  Pumpkin cookies.  Pumpkin lattes.  Pumpkin!  Pumpkin!  Pumpkin!  And this year, it seems that the shelves are even more laden with sweet pumpkin happiness - heck, there are even Pumpkin Pie Poptarts - NO JOKE!  I want.  Unfortunately, all of this pumpkiny-goodness does not really fit the clean eating project that I'm working on.  It is totally creating a strain on my mad-skillz of willpower.  :)

So...what is a pumpkin-obsessed healthy girl to do?  I think I might need to bake.  Yes, me - the girl who cooks but does not bake.  At all.  Because baking requires measurement and precision, yet I'm a bit more of an improvisationist in the kitchen.  Baking does not suit my natural kitchen strengths and tests every last bit of patience I have.  That being said, if I'm going to make it through this season without succumbing to the pumpkiny goodness of Starbucks Pumpkin Lattes washing down Pumpkin Pie Poptarts, I'm going to need to find an alternative.

Here are two recipes I'm thinking of trying:

http://balancedbites.com/2012/10/easy-recipe-carrot-pumpkin-spice-muffins.html

and

http://paleoparents.com/2011/pumpkin-pucks/

Hopefully one or the other (or both!) will quell my pumpkin cravings and keep me on the straight and narrow of doing right by my body.  But seriously...Pumpkin Pie Poptarts....I want.  I want.  I want.

Instead, I will put on a little Vivaldi, Autumn, and make a grocery list for my pumpkin happiness alternatives.

Exhausted

Living in continual chaos is exhausting, frightening.   The catch is that it's also very addictive. -- Lorna Luft

I'm a workaholic.  Before long I'm traveling on my nervous energy alone.  This is incredibly exhausting.  -- Eva Gabor

Recently I've been exhausted - I feel like I'm running in circles...not running to train.  I realize that a lot of the busy-ness in my life is self-inflicted...it's easy to keep saying yes when things that look like positives are offered.  And the scope of "positive" is pretty broad - is it good for my career, is it good for my family, is it good for my health, does it sound like fun?  Unfortunately, these positives are often exclusive - it may be good for my career and sound like fun, but it doesn't give much to my family.  It may be good for my family and be healthy, but it doesn't sound like fun.  As new opportunities come up, I've often accepted them even if they only meet one of the above positives - and even if they have a potential negative effect on other areas. I'm not good at saying NO - which leads to continual chaos and functioning purely on nervous energy.  As a consequence, I am exhausted.  So far I have been able to keep up with my training and am keeping my head above water with my many obligations - but I'm worried in the chaos that something is going to slip through the cracks.  I'm hoping that running to train will clear up some of this chaos and stress from my head.

Heading to the Hills!

After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb. -- Nelson Mandela

This season I managed to climb the great hill of my open water swimming monkey...so I've been looking for more hills to climb - and surprisingly they are not too hard to find.  I'm going to climb the marathon hill (again) in March and beat it this time.  And then I'm going to climb the hill of climbing hills.  Remember earlier this year when climbing hills on my bike made me cry?  I do.  When we were looking at HIMs for next year (yes, I'm so excited after Patriots that I am ready for two HIMs for 2014), I said I wanted one that had a downhill swim, a downhill bike, and a flat run.  Yeah, not so many of them out there.  I was going to do Eagleman in Maryland (not a downhill swim, but flat - flat - flat), but the lodging sitch there was less than optimal.  Instead we decided that I'm going to do Raleigh 70.3 on June 1, 2014...my first official "IRONMAN (R)" race.  The swim isn't downhill, but it is in a lake, so I shouldn't have to fight the currents and tides.  They've changed the run course to make it less hilly.  But the bike course?  Yeah...it's another hill to climb.  Many hills to climb, in fact.  See?

Looks like fun, no?  No - but that's the point, right.  A new challenge - new hills to climb.  The climb is what it is all about.  Miley said so, before she became a creepy little twerker and all.  :-o

The struggles I'm facing

The chances I'm taking

Sometimes might knock me down

But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it

But these are the moments that

I'm gonna remember most, yeah

Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong,

Just keep pushing on

'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain,

I'm always gonna wanna make it move

Always gonna be a uphill battle

Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there

Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's the climb, yeah!

Body Image

I used to refer to myself as a 'theoretical anorexic,' just as crazy when it came to body image, but saved by a lack of self-discipline.  My daughters do everything better than I do -- they're smarter, more beautiful, happier.  What if they end up better at anorexia, too? -- Ayelet Waldman

So this isn't one of those feel-good posts.  It's something that has been weighing heavily on me for a while.  (No pun intended.)  I am having a hard time with my body image.  Four years ago, I weighed 5-10 pounds less than I do today.  Two years ago, I weighed 45 pounds more than I do today.  A weight swing of 50+ pounds in that short of time is enough to screw up anyone's body image (even more than it may have been already).  But it's silly, isn't it?  My body is strong.  It has accomplished amazing things.  I should look at myself in the mirror and be proud.  I should see the waist I didn't have a year ago, and the new arm muscles that I talked about a few posts back, and the strong legs that got me so far.  Yet the pictures from my triathlon make me cringe...not beam.

Nike ran a series of ads a few years ago trying to address the disconnect between what people see and how awesome athletic bodies are.  Here's one of my favorite ads...I have thunder thighs.  And that's a compliment because they are strong and toned and muscular and although they are unwelcome in the petite section, they are cheered on in marathons.

I'd like to be able to look at myself and feel that way; look at my triathlon pictures and not focus on how lumpy I look in a tri-suit; look at the pictures of me afterwards with my medal and notice more than the excess flab that is not contained.  My body is strong.  My body is muscular.  My body is healthy.  It's my body image that isn't so healthy.

But there is a flip-side...it is a well known fact that losing a little weight will help drop a few minutes on the bike and run.  I'm not slim - I have a few pounds to lose and it would be awesome to be faster.  There's got to be a balance between wanting to drop those pounds and not hating what I see in the mirror.  How does that work?

And most importantly, how do I fix this body image thing AND drop those pounds AND keep my daughters from developing their own body image issues?  They are currently young and athletic -- they can eat what they want (and I wonder sometimes if they are even eating enough...not because they are restricting themselves, but because they are wonderful little balls of energy).  How do I keep them believing that their bodies, just the way they are, are strong, muscular, and healthy?

Listen to Your Body. It's Smarter than You Are.

Be good to yourself.  Listen to your body, to your heart.  We're very hard on ourselves, and we're always feeling like we're not doing enough.  It's a terribly hard job. -- Marcia Wallace

It's been an interesting post-race week.  Maybe not interesting - totally normal, in fact.  But interesting in how my body is talking to me.  When I went to Masters for a little swim on Monday, I was on top of the world.  I led my lane, I felt great, and I forced myself to get out of the pool after about 30 minutes because I was just trying to loosen up.  I thought about getting up and going for a run on Tuesday morning, but my legs were sore, so I slept in.  Wednesday morning, I went to early Masters and thought I was going to die - but then Wednesday evening I did a short run on the treadmill that felt awesome.  On Thursday I did a short trail run, and that too felt awesome.  Friday I took off on purpose, because I was planning on doing the century ride on Saturday.

Now, OK - maybe it seems stupid to schedule a century ride, Heart of Virginia, one week after my first HIM, but it wasn't a race.  It was just to go for a supported ride, enjoy the scenery, and spend some time on Baby.  (Freyja is getting her end-of-season tune up and cleaning.)  I went to the ride and it sucked.  It was way too hilly, way too windy, and because of those things, way too soon after my HIM.  I bailed out and only did 63 miles.  That's actually kind of funny, isn't it - ONLY 63 miles.  :)  I was struggling with the hills and I decided, after listening to my body, to cut it short.  The century isn't an A-race or a B-race or even a race.  It was just supposed to be a fun training session and it simply wasn't fun.  Some of it was definitely on me, but I also was less than impressed with the ride organizers.  The course markings were not super, the rest areas were not ready at the right time and inadequately supplied and staffed, and the course design was stupid.  Plus the t-shirt is ugly and cheap looking.  I had done the metric century version of this ride a few years ago, and I thought it was fine.  But I got a decent shirt that year, the course was in a different place, and it was my first organized ride, so I may not have known any better.  Anyway, since I was disappointed in the ride and my legs were yelling at me, I listened.  I need to keep the next big event in focus - the Crawling Crab 1/2 Mary in October.

On a less whiny note - I joined the club...I am a proud owner of a 70.3 sticker on my car.

OK, so maybe it's a little obnoxious - but I'm proud of myself and I want everyone to know it.  (I also ordered a 70.3 necklace, but I didn't like it and am sending it back for a different one.)